Page 39 - Chatham-Kent Hospice
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Experiencing Grief
When someone close to us dies, the confusion and mixed emotions we feel can often become overwhelming.However,it is important to recognize that there is no standard way of experiencing loss and no right way to grieve. It is completely normal to feel a mixture of shock, anger, guilt, despair and relief, along with many other different emotions.There are, however, some things that you can do which may help you to cope, along with people who can support you, if you need it, during this period in your life.
Recognizing grief
Losing someone we love is something that we all have to go through at some point in our lives. Each experience is personal and different, and can be influenced
by many factors.Your feelings
are likely to be affected by the relationship you had with the person, your cultural background, and your religious beliefs. It is important to remember that grief may be displayed in different ways for each individual.
Grief can manifest itself in a range of emotions:
Shock - you may have thought that you were prepared if the death was expected or because you’ve experienced a loss previously. But whatever the circumstances it is common to feel an initial sense of shock at the passing of someone close to us.
Anger - it is very common to feel anger whilst you are grieving; this can be because they passed before their time, things that did or did not happen, or anger that they are no longer there.
Guilt - people often feel a sense of guilt that they themselves were not the one to die, or guilt at certain circumstances involving their loved one.
Despair - a grieving person can feel despair and feel at a loss as to how they will cope and what their future life will hold.
Numbness - it can often feel like you are living in a “fog” after the loss of a loved one.You may feel numb or worry that you have not cried, but feeling numb is often a coping mechanism when experiencing intense emotional situations. Gradually over time the feeling of numbness subsides, allowing us to start functioning and healing.
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